It was the first family film of 2010 – Jackie Chan as an International spy/friendly neighbor with all the moves. Unfortunately, Chan’s martial arts talent is one of the only good things about “The Spy Next Door”.
Chan plays Bob, who’s retired from the spy business and wants to marry the single mother with three kids who lives next door. Her kids think Bob’s a loser and they don’t want them to get together. Bob’s gets to take care of the kids when the mom has to go out of town, but no one knows about Bob’s secret life as a spy, until the bad guys come looking for him and the valuable formula that one of the kids downloaded by accident.
The plot is silly and no one in this family acts the way normal people would act if they found out that their babysitter was a spy being chased by Russian mobsters. How about picking-up a phone and calling the police!
That’s not all that’s wrong with this movie. There isn’t a single laugh in the script. And the acting is weak. Chan has never been known for his acting ability, but that’s o.k., because he makes-up for it with his incredible stunt work and fighting scenes. But the rest of the cast has no excuse.
Billy Ray Cyrus and George Lopez both play CIA Agents. Neither will be putting this movie on their resumes.
Here’s another thing that bugs me: this family has a pet pig. It seems like every suburban household in family comedies these days has to have a pet pig. Do you know anybody who has a pet pig? I sure don’t. How come every “Hollywood” family seems to have one. Enough with the pet pigs!
“The Spy Next Door” is directed by Brian Levant (“Are We There Yet?”, “Jingle All the Way”). He uses a lot of tight shots and the dialogue is very sloppy, especially with the kids, who are awful. And the fake Russian accents of the villains are laughable.
“The Spy Next Door” is rated PG for mild violence. It’s appropriate for everybody, and kids may like the action scenes, but there’s not much else for anyone to like, except the 70’s spy music, which is cool.
On The Official Kid Critic Report Card, “The Spy Next Door” gets a D+.
Chan fans – skip this and wait for “The Karate Kid” remake, which comes out in June. Hopefully there won’t be any pet pigs in that one.